april fool

i've had so much to write but just not been in the mood to sit and type it all out...

things are all still up and down with the fiance, but at least now when it's down he is still communicating with me, so i am coping with it better. so hence i'm more able to blog today i guess. and as well as write, i've made it to the gym as well - i have a new workout routine that my lovely trainer joshua has made for me - trying to build myself back up and lose the weight that has been piling on...so already hurting, am gonna be really sore in the morning!

and that's not the only soreness i've got.

finally seem to be getting my first post-treatment post-depo period. and it doesn't feel right or like any of the other periods i've ever had...for one thing this bleeding is dark dark almost black, and chunky like a chocolate brownie. but with cramps that are alot less painful than any i've ever had in my life, ever. strange.

another strange thing is i seem to have some wierd post-treatment stigmata (see photo, those are old piercings). i've got a mark/bruise on my belly that looks just like an interferon shot mark. how strange is this? the fiance thinks its some sort of psychosomatic thing. i'm not sure what it is...its just wierd.

friday

wow.
that was one loooong week!
thursday night's boat party was okay, i wore my best chloe and scandotrash cruisewear and sat up on deck holding court as the music was sooo bad that i wasn't going to bother dancing - as i've said elsewhere - i'm saving up my dancing for ibiza's closing parties in september!!!!

next day though my ass and everything else was truly kicked.
everything hurt again and tired tired tired - still it was a nice friday having lots of meeting with production companies that have become friends. i am lucky that i love me work! it pushes me through when all i want to do is cry and sleep...which is what i did last night, as tired and hurting is not the best way to go into a shot weekend.

usual 5am wake up, so downed some painkillers but couldn't get back to sleep, so joined the daughter who was passed out on the sofa to watch some old skool star trek episodes. but yuck! there was cucumber stuck to the remote...well at least when she drunkenly snacks it is healthy stuff, lol. so 1pm and finally back in bed all achey breaky - going to get myself together and go to the gym though for some gently gently exercise to try to loosen up these painful joints!

wish me luck...the weather isn't looking too good either.
gotta love the english summer. not.

friday updates

crochet update:
1 blind octopus delivered to work friend
1 purple octopus with eyes given to daughter isis
2 more and a squid taking over our cacti...will take some photos soon!
and i made 2 more octopussies last night, am going to get started on some jellyfish soon too.

work update:
office closed for move so doing it from bed today so far, which is lovely as i probably only slept a couple hours last night after fucking for ages i still woke up at 3am wide awake and not able to get back to sleep til probably 6am for the fiance's alarm to go at 7am...but that meant more cuddles so i'm not complaining.

tx update:
tummy not as bad but still not great. keeping things down...a bit.
shot 15 tonight. the fiance's bro and dad are in town tomoro so hope i can soldier through.
will be nice to see them but they must be wondering why i'm always so exhausted - well, besides work...but both being chefs should know what it is like!

oki i should actually do work.
o and download some more learnitalianpod casts to listen to if i do make it the gym today!

exhausted!

i'm not sure if its the drugs or the jetlag or a combination of both but the last couple days i've been exhausted! although i still managed to get up and out and to the gym yesterday evening...was goin' to go for a lightweight workout but in the end managed pretty much my usual routine - just not as heavy duty on the stepper as usual - but pushed everything else out fine...

...and not paying too dear for it today thank god.
actually think i'm feeling better for it!

well off out to try and get my nails done.

thanks so much to the couple of you that have left lovely comments so far x